When someone is diagnosed with Alzheimer’s, life changes—and not just for that person. Family members are thrust into a new world they may know little about. And if you’re the caregiver, trial and error can rule the day.

But it doesn’t have to. People who have been in your shoes are often happy to share their advice. You can find books and classes and blogs and articles. You can even hire a professional—a geriatric-care manager—to help you sort through everything.

To get you started, here are our top-four tips to remember—the ABCDs of Alzheimer’s caregiving:

1. Allow Breaks

Because of the stress involved, Alzheimer’s caregivers are more likely to get sick and even die at earlier ages. Don’t hesitate to ask for help. Taking breaks helps you remain the best caregiver you can be. Potential sources of help include family and friends, adult day-care facilities, and home care. Learn more about your dementia-care options here.

2. Banish Guilt

As Alzheimer’s progresses, it becomes harder and harder for one person to provide all the care. You may eventually need to move your loved one to a nursing home. Even though many people feel guilty about this, it’s often the best option. Keeping your loved one at home may be unhealthy for both of you.

3. Take Classes

Caregiving is an acquired skill. You can get a head start on what you need to know and the easiest ways to do things through caregiver classes. Your local Area Agency on Aging might know of some classes in your area—possibly at little to no cost. Your  Alzheimer’s Association chapter may also offer classes.

4. Recognize Depression

Alzheimer’s is a heartbreaking disease, and the care required can be overwhelming. As you might imagine, caregivers are at an increased risk for depression.

If you’re depressed, seek help as soon as possible from your family doctor or a mental-health professional. Depression makes you see the world as worse than it is, and it robs you of the opportunity to care for your loved one in the best ways you can.

Symptoms of depression include persistent feelings of hopelessness, guilt, helplessness or worthlessness. You may have decreased energy, difficulty concentrating or irritability. Mental Health America has an informal online depression screening test here. It’s not meant for diagnosis, just information, so be sure to see a professional too.