Interacting with a loved one who has Alzheimer’s can be stressful. You almost have to learn a whole new way of communicating. But certain practices can go a long way toward making your visits rewarding and meaningful. And they’re pretty simple to do.

Communication Tips

Perhaps the number-one piece of advice is, don’t correct the person. People with Alzheimer’s may sometimes think they’re in a different time or you’re a different person. Just go with it, experts say. Arguing won’t help and may cause agitation.

However, that doesn’t mean you can’t somewhat direct the conversation. If your mother thinks you’re her husband, for example, “just go with the flow and slowly change the subject,” advises Cindy Keith, R.N., dementia counselor and owner of M.I.N.D. in Memory Care. Or, if your dad says it’s time to go home now, talk about home and subtly transition to another topic.

Also, listen to what your loved one is saying at an emotional level. “For example, patients in the nursing home where I worked often demanded to be taken to see their mothers,” says Lisa Greenberg, a psychologist in Madison, NJ. When this happened, she’d respond, “I guess it would be great to see your mother,” and then ask questions like, 'What would you like to talk to her about?,” “What's she like?,” “What's the best thing she cooks?”

Another huge tip is never to say anything along the lines of, “Do you remember?” Instead, just give your loved one the information.

Tips for Communicating Without Words

Pay attention to body language, and be sure to appear friendly, not threatening. “Smile, and communicate face-to-face,” says geriatric psychiatrist Allan Anderson, medical director of The Gardens at William Hill Manor in Easton, MD. “Do not approach them from the side or back. Their vision is often limited, with less peripheral vision.”

Most Important Tip: Visit

Other common pieces of advice include not treating the person like a child, bringing pictures or an activity to do together, and doing something simple but positive such as holding the person’s hand.

But most importantly, “the huge message is to go visit,” says Jill Grimes, a family doctor in Austin, TX, who speaks nationally about dementia. “So many people stay away because it’s uncomfortable and they don’t know what to say.”

For more ideas for things to do and talk about with someone who has Alzheimer’s, check out “5 Memory Activities for People With Alzheimer’s.”